Aye, there's only one story this week - the Great Apple Tree Tumble of 2010. A day that will live in infamy. The day that a young boy's life was wrecked by the neglect, wilful negligence and the callous disregard of his own sister.
The whole matter is now in the hands of professional ambulance chasers at Claims Direct and we're suing Ellen for every penny she's worth. I think it's only reasonable compensation for the inconvenience, mental anguish and lost weekend that we've suffered because she failed to throw herself in the path of Ewan's tumbling torso, breaking his fall. The fact that he chose to leap from the top of a rope ladder is neither here nor there.
Anyway, the excitement started on Thursday with a phone call at work telling me that I was getting away early - "I'm at the hospital with Ewan. He's hurt his wrist. Can you come and take Ellen away?". I think at that moment she was riding round on a tricycle aiming at the legs of anyone changing a lightbulb.
I get there and this is what I see. The serene, slightly spacey look is thanks to the morphine. A few hours later though and he's settled in with one of the ward's DVD players using Distraction Therapy© (I'm not making this up, they've given it a proper name with capital letters and everything) to ease the pain. The following morning he Distracted© himself with a book before they took him into theatre.
And this is what they did (click to see it BIG) - inserted titanium elastic nails into the bones. They'll stay there for three months and then get taken out. Just a couple of small nicks to free the ends that are tucked under the skin and they'll get pulled out. They're quite flexible. There was a wee lassie in the hospital having it done when we were there and it didn't seem to dampen her appetite for crisps.
The anaesthetic takes a few hours to wear off completely, leaving him with an itchy nose. But after a wee while he was back to looking glum and wondering where the Distractions© were. He did fine keeping off the morphine and he was soon tucking into the toast - all the more tasty for being made with Sunblest white pan bread. None of that wholemeal, sourdough shite he's forced to eat a home. Home on Saturday. Fell asleep in the car on the way back from hospital so we drove to Glasgow to let him have a good kip.
So, it's been a weekend of Distraction© - TV, computer - anything that involves not using your right arm. He started off a bit glum and feeling sorry for himself but it hasn't taken him long to get used to it and the pain seems to have eased off to nothing. Hardly any painkillers today. Spot the transformation from watching TV on Saturday afternoon to eating ice cream in the evening. Finally, here he is struggling to have a bath this morning.
And, of course, we don't really blame wee Ellen. But naturally we've chopped down the tree, and every other tree in the garden and removed all items over 24 inches, just so that no other parent ever has to suffer the pain and torment that we've been through. And we've called for a full public enquiry into the dangers posed by unfenced trees.
So, here's some photos of the cheeky wee beggar.
Comments